Monday, November 17, 2008

Well....It happened...they left.

What a stupid crappy day. I think I am going to go have myself a little pity party. We all went to Denny's for breakfast to see them off. Apparantly, we are a bit more emotional than Josh's side of the family. We would tell stories, laugh, then burst into tears.

I looked like a crazy woman doing the "snot" cry. Poor sweet Ginger tried to help her crying Grammy....she "fixed" my crying (balled her fists and rubbed them into my eyes). I will miss that little demon so bad.

I am grateful for Josh. He is such a sweet gentle man and a wonderful husband, father and son. I know he will take great care of his family. He has always wanted to travel and this is a great opportunity for him to do so.

Manda came over last night all by herself for some mommy time. We just kept watching another and another show just to avoid her leaving. I think I will be lost for a little while without her. She is such a dear, wonderful daughter and friend. She loves her mom and is so good to me.

I feel like a part of my heart is gone. When Erin left it wasnt so bad because I knew she would come back home. This time though it really sucks. I know that parents are supposed to let their children go on their path in life and support them through it. However, I want to scream at them to come back. I want to protect and take care of them. I don't like this letting go crap. I hope this gets easier with time.

I remember Manda as a little feisty thing. Throwing Ginormous temper tantrums, giving me the "finger" (used the wrong finger though), rocking the sassy curls. Now she is all grown up with a family of her own. She's beautiful a great mother, much better than I was. She is so kind, yet still with a sassy streak to her. She has the best laugh ever, she throws her head back and lets loose completely. (think Disneyland). How lucky am I to have her?

I hope their flight goes well. I, on the other hand, am going to go cry for a bit I think.


Shelli said...

I'm crying with you, Cari. I can feel how hard it is, and I see it just on the horizon for me. Sucks! I know how much Amanda loves you, and I know her heart is breaking, too. That's something distance will never diminish -- you are very blessed with that kind of relationship with your daughter. Of course, she'll be ok, and of course, this will be good for her. Now, go get some chocolate.

Vidal's Nest said...

Cari! I wish I were there to give you a hug! I am tearing up reading this and I am not so closley involved!
I have enjoyed getting to know Amanda through reading her blog. You can see what a fun, kind person she has become! And~the feisty side too! I love that!
Take a day or two or three for your pity party! You deserve it!

Amanda said...

Mom, I love you so much, and miss you terribly already, the only thing that makes this move a little better is knowing that you'll be here after the baby is born and that's not so far away now. now go get a big bottle!!


It is sad but what a great opportunity. We will do our best to take good care of her out here. Of course, I am a little overwhelmed already so I can't promise too much. It is so nice that you get to come out after the baby is born. Going home to visit is the only thing that makes it bearable being so far from home.

Ginger said...

Boy do I know just how you feel! It breaks my heart to be so far away from so many of my kids. The family never seems complete if even one is missing. That's why I love the blogs, it helps me stay in touch and hear all the day to day activities. I think you need a blog make-over! Lauri - are you listening?